Be warned, this is a sad story with an important message at the end.

Jamie was young and already a mom. Her parents were taking care of the two of them. There was a lot of love in the home but things were not easy for anyone, money was hard to get and quickly spent, time for each other scarce.

That’s when Jamie made some bad decisions. And while trying to escape them, she got into real trouble. She was too young to know better, followed people whom she thought she could trust but really couldn’t, whom she thought loved her, but really didn’t. What she got instead was manipulation and exploitation.

Things turned bad. It is a sad story my friend. I warned you. It is.

But Jamie told me that she did what she did because she had a whole in her heart which she was trying to fill, and since she thought she needed love to fill it, she went looking for it outside of herself.

She has a message for her daughter, and maybe for you:
​It is ok to want/need to be loved. It is ok to want/need to fill this whole. But before looking outside of yourself for someone to come and fill it, start by filling it yourself. With creativity: dance, draw, write, paint, sing, act, cook ,… or by getting involved in something that interests you like sports, or science, or volunteering, or... Put your energy into something that lights you up. Explore that. Get in touch with that. Focus on that. And when you start noticing that the whole inside of you is being filled up, you’ll also notice that you feel much better about yourself. Because the love that you used to look for outside yourself will actually come from inside you. Then, and only then, you might be ready to be find love in someone else as well.

Not before.

Thank you Jamie, for this story.

Melanie
with Mel's help
life coaching

​“This too shall pass”

I heard that phrase for the first time in the 1997 film ‘My best friend’s wedding’ starring Julia Roberts.
In short, the film was about a woman trying to stop her best friend’s wedding to go through as she wanted to marry him herself. All I remember about the scene where this phrase was said is that Julia’s character was distraught. She was sitting on the floor in the corridor of a hotel. I think she was crying.
The bellman asked her: "Are you ok?"
And when she was done sharing what was up, he told her: “My grandmother always told me: this too shall pass*”.
 
I still remember it.
It made so much sense.
A “ahah moment” as Oprah would say.
Such a simple phrase saying so much, helping so much, meaning so much.

It talked about life, about how we see things, about putting things in perspective, about not taking things for granted, about how time heals, about how it flies, …
 
It is not has if life was nothing but a calm and jolly stroll in the park.
Oh no! In my experience, it is more like a crazy roller coaster ride.
It is full of ups and downs, twists and turns, some fun, some not so fun.
 
So when times feel hard, hold on and be patient.
Remember: This too shall pass.

And when times are good, notice it and enjoy them.
Because: This too shall pass.

Sending you love 
Melanie
life coach
with Mel's help
 
*: Pop culture introduced me to “This too shall pass” but obviously, its origins are not from a film. According to Wikipedia, it seems to be a Persian adage.